Confessions of Non-foodie-blogger

The mommy-blogger letter seemed to be relatable… and after a rough couple days  wrestling with cauliflower pizza crust and concocting a stir fry that tasted like ferret food, I decided this post was unavoidable.

Confessions of a Non-foodie Blogger

Dear Foodie-bloggers,

* I tried to make your cauliflower pizza crust (which you swore was “sooo not nasty”) and what I got was a personal pangea pizza, which I ate alone.
….Correction, E took one bite.

it didn't taste bad... it also didn't come off the foil. #sprayorpay
it didn’t taste bad… it also didn’t come off the foil. #sprayorpay

 

*  I made these apple muffins once and now I’m afraid to be alone with them.

* Kale is the devil’s lettuce. You can’t make me; I won’t touch it.

* Sometimes I wonder what kind of body-shaping spanx hide under those aprons. Not sayin, just sayin…(i would be grossly overweight if i were you)

* True or False…Confessions by Usher… playing in my head right now.

* I added flour to homemade broccoli cheddar soup once (to thicken it a bit, of course.) But then I added a lot… It was so gross. I asked you how to fix it on twitter and you actually tweeted back… which didn’t make anything better because all you said was, “You did what?”

* The great all-seeing-eye of Michelle Obama watches you…

* I know you secretly make bank despite giving away all those recipes. (thanks for the recipes, btw)

* I can’t ever spell recipes right the first time.

* When I take pictures of what I bake on my iphone, it looks like I’m using a photo-filter titled “dog-pee.” I’m jealous of  your shinning photos.

* Squash soup is weird. I know it; you know it. Moving on.

* Tony Chachere’s Original Creole Seasoning… you neglect its spicious mastery. #payhomage

* True or false, Confessions by Usher… still in my head.

* Lastly– I’ll admit– I like you.
Yes, yes, yes… you and the mommy bloggers. You make the interweb world a more wonderfully mouth-watering place to be. So keep showing “the man” what’s what and making money off of giving away those delectable dishes. We’re all a little fat & happier because of it.

Here’s to hoping some crazy huge person doesn’t sue you,
Cheers!

~ Meg

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Those Winter Sundays

Those Winter Sundays

by Robert Hayden

Sundays too
my father got up early
and put his clothes on in the blue black cold,
then with cracked hands that ached
from labor in the weekday weather made
banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him.

I’d wake and hear the
cold splintering, breaking.
When the rooms were warm, he’d call,
and slowly I would rise and dress,
fearing the chronic angers of that house,

Speaking indifferently
to him,
who had driven out the cold
and polished my good shoes as well.
What did I know, what did I know
of love’s austere and lonely offices?

Dear Mommy Bloggers

First things first…(for those that don’t know) what are mommy bloggers?
Mommy bloggers are basically any woman who blogs and at some point mentioned her child. Lots of people do it. It’s a thing.

… As I typed in “What are mommy bloggers,” to give you  a simple definition of the term, here’s what popped up on Google. It was too lol (laugh-out-loud)  (or, for you moms, lots of love) not to share.

mommy bloggersMy favorite is “what are mommy arms?”

I digress.

Dear Mommy-bloggers,

I’m not a mommy.  I openly admit that I “just don’t get it” cuz I’m not yet a sweaty, sleep-deprived, unconditionally loving (with bouts of logic),  breast-milk-benefit-preaching parent… yet.

I am, however, a person with ears and eyes, which sometimes work coherently enough to send little electrical signals to my brain (which I first spelled as brian….).

See? I’m poking fun at myself too!–While still tickling the flabby (or Michelle Obama-fierce) under-arms of all you mommies. Let’s laugh together! Let’s sip margaritas! (Okay, I’ll sip a margarita and you can have your homemade sugarless vodka lemonade.)

…Did I mention you’re great? loved! and paid by all those diaper-ad people!
Bravo! Keep it up and stuff! Meanwhile I will write too– but probably less about diapers and my awesome homemade quiches and more about… other relationships, mini-revelations, and simple or hilarious anecdotes.

In true-serious-earnestness though, without the stories from women like you, the web would be a little more convoluted with pictures of insanely skinny, yet large-breasted women and those adorable cat memes (see below).

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Thanks to you, instead we have a lot more  kick-a** recipes and well-written monologues about loving little, stinky, messy humans. Thank you. We like what you write; we really do.

I just hope that even though us other women are not quite yet in your club– you’ll still read our stuff once and while, still offer your insights and learn from ours. I even hope that sometimes you’ll read our blogs and articles and books for the pure enjoyment of sharing in something bigger than being mommy. For the beauty of sharing in the experiences of hurting, loving, healing and all the in-between that comes with being human.

Stay cool, mommies.
Sending big love to you (& the hubs, kiddos, and quiches)

~ Meg
(and the other non-mommy-bloggers)

Truth, Tears, Anger, and Grace

It’s been a blah day. Did I say day?–month. January is notorious as “divorce” month, and it is undoubtably the coldest month for northerners to endure. So yes… blah. Picture the adults from Charlie Brown kind of blah. Everything a blur of garbled words, of unconscious motion. And the sense that the -11 temp had somehow seeped into my heart. Trying to turn up it’s heat only fogged up my mind.

I needed truth and grace when all I seemed to have was tears and anger.
This lovely exposition popped up in my google search; since then, I’ve been reeling.
It’s a talk given by a speaker whom I love, only days after 9/11.

First the prayers. Individuals from different backgrounds and cultures praying for a hurting nation after the greatest tragedy since Pearl Harbor. A city and nation which prided itself with accomplishment and  power was left unhinged. And the grieving began.

And.. so did the lame-sauce “answers” for the tragedy:
1. We are being judged–for (Democrats) our lack of care for global justice (Republicans) our lack of moral values.
2. THEY are the evil ones (even subhuman.) WE are the good.

In the midst of this, the best leaders spoke not of answers.  They spoke of hope– a hope to see new life come blazing from the ashes.

And then this story

Jesus hears a good friend of His is dying. So he hits the road and on the way into Bethany, meets up with both of the sisters of his now dead friend, Lazaras. Though Jesus is intending to (and later does) raise Lazarus from the dead, he also responds very acutely to what he’s hearing from Lazarus’ sisters.

the first sister

Martha said to Him, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. But even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give you.” Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” Martha said to Him, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live.”

There’s the truth that no one was expecting. Jesus claims not only to hold the power to raise the dead, but claims to embody that power–to be new life for anyone who believes. But he doesn’t stop with speaking the truth…

the second sister

“Then when Mary came where Jesus was and saw Him, she fell down at His feet, saying to Him, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.” Therefore, when Jesus saw her weeping and the Jews who came with her weeping, He groaned in the spirit and was troubled. And He said, Where have you laid him?” They said to Him, “Lord come and see. Jesus wept. 

Truth, Tears, Anger, & Grace Why is it that out of those four all I really hear about from  Christians are the two bookends–truth & grace.
Though it’s translated “He groaned in the spirit and was troubled” the actual Greek words used refer much more to the emotion of anger. He was angry. Angry at death and the havoc it had already caused. And though he knew he would conquer it, death was still worth being mad at.
And then He was sorrowful, and in his tears he didn’t just weep out of sorrow for His own loss. I believe His own grief was for not just the temporary loss his friend’s life, but the lives of countless others before and after. The sting of death was felt by God even before the cross, and He wept.

grace, a gift undeserved

While still grieving, Jesus told the people to roll away the stone over the tomb where they’d  placed Lazarus. Four days his corpse had been rotting, so with some convincing, they consented.

Then they took away the stone from the place where the dead man was lying. And Jesus lifted up His eyes and said. “Father I thank you that You have heard Me. And I know that you always hear Me, but because of the people who are standing by I said this. that they may believe that you sent Me.” Now when He had said these things, He cried with a loud voice. “Lazarus come forth!” And he who had died came out bound hand and foot with grave clothes. Then many of the Jews who had come to Mary and had seen the things Jesus did, believed in Him. But some of them went away to the religious leaders and told them the things Jesus did… Then from that day on they plotted to put him to death.

Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead knowing  this would eventually lead to his own death– all as a prequel of what he did for the rest of humanity on the cross. He knew pain, injustice, tragedy more deeply than any human to walk this planet. And he did not stop there;  to prove that suffering is never a waste, He made a way to God through His own. He died so that real death would never have to touch anyone again.

Whether or not you can believe this story to be historical truth, the process with which Jesus grieved–truth, tears, anger & grace will always be the only complete way to find hope amidst evil, tragedy, and death.  This kind of hope doesn’t seek cheap answers. This hope weeps, curses loss, and yet rubs the joy of new life in the face of death.

**this is my own mini-recap of a talk given by Tim Keller entitled “Truth, Tears, Anger, and Grace” props to him.

the bible passage can be found in the book of John, chapter 11.