The mommy-blogger letter seemed to be relatable… and after a rough couple days wrestling with cauliflower pizza crust and concocting a stir fry that tasted like ferret food, I decided this post was unavoidable.
Confessions of a Non-foodie Blogger
* I tried to make your cauliflower pizza crust (which you swore was “sooo not nasty”) and what I got was a personal pangea pizza, which I ate alone.
….Correction, E took one bite.
* I made these apple muffins once and now I’m afraid to be alone with them.
* Kale is the devil’s lettuce. You can’t make me; I won’t touch it.
* Sometimes I wonder what kind of body-shaping spanx hide under those aprons. Not sayin, just sayin…(i would be grossly overweight if i were you)
* True or False…Confessions by Usher… playing in my head right now.
* I added flour to homemade broccoli cheddar soup once (to thicken it a bit, of course.) But then I added a lot… It was so gross. I asked you how to fix it on twitter and you actually tweeted back… which didn’t make anything better because all you said was, “You did what?”
* The great all-seeing-eye of Michelle Obama watches you…
* I know you secretly make bank despite giving away all those recipes. (thanks for the recipes, btw)
* I can’t ever spell recipes right the first time.
* When I take pictures of what I bake on my iphone, it looks like I’m using a photo-filter titled “dog-pee.” I’m jealous of your shinning photos.
* Squash soup is weird. I know it; you know it. Moving on.
* Tony Chachere’s Original Creole Seasoning… you neglect its spicious mastery. #payhomage
* True or false, Confessions by Usher… still in my head.
* Lastly– I’ll admit– I like you.
Yes, yes, yes… you and the mommy bloggers. You make the interweb world a more wonderfully mouth-watering place to be. So keep showing “the man” what’s what and making money off of giving away those delectable dishes. We’re all a little fat & happier because of it.
Here’s to hoping some crazy huge person doesn’t sue you,